I had read of Marriage being a trap, those outside it yearn to enter the trap. Those inside struggling to get out.
Now, one enters this institution of Marriage, by way of Love, or family arranges to enter them in to the auspicious NET.
It’s been a long debating issue since time immemorial, which option is best, love marriage or arranged marriage.
Mine was an arranged marriage and I traversed the path called marriage pretty well, ( my personal views only, reader at discretion to see either way ).
Only yester night, my beloved asked me sweetly as I was busy writing this post itself.
“Dear, now you will slam and hit on the laptop and then sleep, or ?.”
I immediately shut down my already pampered laptop, the screen of which already flickered nervously every now and then, not knowing when the poor thing might get a heavy beating.
I often see people discussing and vouching for Arranged marriage salient features, (aged unclez and aunties group) while teens, all the more excited and ready to live entire life on a string of love.
I know many may have said or felt strongly in unison of my golden utterances that I am penning down for the upcoming generation to be enlisted gloriously into the fraternity of married cell.
I know, many may not concur with me here, but I am penning as my experience tells me. So if your gastric juices start revolting, just thank me for having stirred your system.
If marriage is arranged by parents, the person marrying may face some issues but one most strong pillar could be the parents of both couples. All trivialities can be easily exploded on their heads, and they can never complain anything to you.
The mother in law v/s newly wed girl, the field of war is all set as she enters the house. It’s a peculiar kind of war, where they exchange harsh words, and in front of their husbands behave as if nothing happened at all and they are going on very well together. The new entrant to house learns the skills to command her husband very quickly, following on the golden footsteps of her mother in law.
Some days ago, my beloved confided that, when she had just entered into marriage, and in my house, she once dreamt of my grandmother, warning to take her in to her realms. And when she had told my mother of it, she had warned on my grandmother’s picture, never to haunt the lovely bride. I now knew how much my grandmother loved me, watching from her heavenly abode.
Teens never know the benefits that rests in arranged marriage.
Whenever mother receives pieces of harsh undertones of the beloved bride, she had chosen herself, she can never blame her son for it. It was her choice and she drinks the humilty with a strength that builds by every passing day.
In love cum arranged marriages, her Mother in Law may have strong inner repulsion towards her, which goes away in due course of time, if one is lucky enough.
And the life rolls on.
Many love saga’s are unable to enter into marriage, and here , as you all may be thinking, their parents are not the spoil sports, the girl or boy dumps the other.
You all may have heard of the Late President of United States, Abraham Lincoln. When he was in teens and of course in deep Love, and when he was dumped by his girlfriend, his reaction letter to his friend was,“Nobody is to blame. I have made a perfect fool of myself.”
A friend phones another friend in the stillness of the night on being dumped and under full influence of alcohol, he is on the top floor of house, where he stays as paying guest. He just informs his old pal that he is about to jump and end his life, once and for all. Now his old friend, happened to have phone number of other students staying in that paying guest house. He instantly called them up to bring the jilted lad down instantly. Irony is that many are not that lucky to get a savior and leave behind themselves crying friends and family.
Teen is a phase of life, where no rules apply. No reason can be set. It follows only what heart says. It detests anyone trying to explain the virtues of arranged marriage to them.
Some bold teens, make a headway to elope away and marry in court of law.
Many supporting friends who sign as witness too, to their holy cause. Now in many cases the girl goes back to her parents and her parents lodge police case on loving groom and all the accomplices of the act. I have personally seen my friend serving a jail sentence for helping a friend to marry.
I was looking at matrimonial sites lately and found some profiles very intriguing. Now, there was a boy, who clearly stated he wanted to be a “ghar jamai” and wanted to be treated well in the house..
I hope he must have found his desired destination.
To conclude, all marriages Love or arranged are to be enjoyed, with patience, endurance, and foresight.
After all It’s your life. Enjoy all seasons of it. Never regret if it’s love or arranged, once you are in the net, don’t ever try to get out, or lament the one’s outside enjoying. It’s a matter of time, they too are going to enter the net, sooner than later.